We are taught how to give advice. To pontificate, to sound wise, to share experiences. But we are rarely taught how to take advice.
And yet, the ability to take advice—really take it—is what separates those who grow from those who stay stuck.
In India, advice flows like chai at a railway station. Unsolicited, abundant, and often, well-intentioned. From the uncle at the tea stall who insists the stock market is rigged, to the aunt who guarantees that turmeric milk will fix everything. Advice is free, and everyone’s an expert.
But how do you separate signal from noise?
The Four Types of Advice Givers
- The Well-Wisher: Parents, elders, close friends. They mean well, but their advice is often driven by fear. “Play it safe.” “Stick to what works.” They want to protect you.
- The Armchair Expert: Someone who has never done what you’re trying to do but has strong opinions anyway. “Startups are risky.” “No one makes money in creative fields.” Smile and nod, but don’t internalize.
- The Practitioner: Someone who has done what you are trying to do. Their advice is practical, often unglamorous. “Make a prototype first.” “Test before you scale.” This is gold—listen carefully.
- The Hidden Agenda Advisor: The salesperson disguised as a mentor. The consultant who subtly nudges you towards their paid service. Recognize their bias before you act on their words.
How to Absorb Advice Without Drowning in It
- Filter Ruthlessly – Just because someone is older, richer, or louder doesn’t mean they are right. Ask: Has this person walked the path I want to walk?
- Seek Contradictory Views – If everyone around you agrees, you’re in an echo chamber. The best advice often challenges your assumptions.
- Don’t Outsource Thinking – No one can decide for you. Advice is input, not a command. Take what serves you, leave the rest.
- Look for Patterns – If multiple trusted people say the same thing, pay attention. If it’s just one loud voice, take it with a pinch of salt.
The Indian Dilemma
In our culture, refusing advice is almost offensive. “Beta, why don’t you do an MBA?” “Government job is the safest.” We are conditioned to equate advice with wisdom, and wisdom with age.
But growth requires discernment. Taking advice is a skill, not a duty.
The best advice isn’t the most common. It’s the most useful. And recognizing that difference? That’s a rare skill indeed.